Three-Ring Churchus

Church today was chock-full of funny little scenarios and events that I thought I would share with you. First, as Mom and I filed into our row, Chuck a very nice older gentleman came over to hand us the "worship folder". I caught a glimpse of his nametag, and for the first time I realized his last name. I'm not sure if he always put his last name on it, but on this particular day, it stood out. I looked over to my Mom and asked, "Is Chuck's last name Hull?" She nodded and I said, "So his name is Chuck Hull." We both chuckled.

After the singing ended, we sat down and Mom opened up her "worship folder" to take a look at all the fun and interesting things that are going on. Upon the opening of the folder, the sermon notes fall. If it were anyone else and not Mom or I for that matter, the notes would have just fallen to the floor without incident. Instead, the notes fall and just before hitting the floor, swoops out flying under the chair in front of her and glides to a stop one row up. Mom and I look at each other with panic and embarrassment in our face. The gentleman in the row, gets up out of his seat, bends down and picks up the paper then hands it back to my mom.

Once the announcements were read by the new jeans wearing Pastor of Community Connections and Men's Ministries, he instructed us all to stand up and greet those around us. This is the worst part of going to church in my opinion, but like a good Christian, I stood and began greeting and shaking hands. I shook one hand, then another, finally coming to a gentleman named Ho. Since we all wear nametags, I commonly will say, "Hi [Person's Name]!" This time I had to stop before I broke into song.

Finally, this week was Communion a ceremony that I have come to dread since my hysterical laughing incident several months ago. A couple of times, I've assisted in handing out the "body" and the "blood" and loved how structured the ceremony was. There was a group of people that would come out with a plate full of "body" and "blood" and they would follow a pattern by handing a plate to every other row. The whole thing would typically go smoothly. This time the pastor at the front asked if a dozen or so people would volunteer to hand out communion and ensure everyone was served. A bunch of people got up and headed to the back to grab a plate. What proceeded was a nightmare. It was an unorganized mess of people literally running around the church to grab the plate from the other end of the row. It seemed that everyone was working the left side of the church, while only a few were attending to the right. For something that was supposed to be a solemn moment of communion with God, it turned into a three-ring circus of people swinging from the rafters.

It was probably one of the more entertaining Church experiences I've had in awhile. I just hope they don't do this to communion again, because it was distracting and completely detracted from its meaning.